There’s a new televised reality competition premiering today.

WAIT! Don’t stop reading. This one’s pretty cool. And very, very sweet.

Ditching the glitz, glamour and high production value of network TV’s biggest talent searches, Showville is purposefully thinking small. As in small town.

Each week, judges Alec Mapa and Lisette Bustamante (above) land in a tiny burg and audition local talent. From there, they choose four finalists and their roles transition into mentors for the acts, which are then voted upon by a live audience comprised of the town’s citizens.

For many of these tiny places, it could be their first brush with Hollywood, small fortune ($10,000) and a flamboyant gay man (yes, Mapa, we’re talkin’ to you).

In the premiere episode, set in Holland, Michigan, acts vary from sideshows and magic acts to puppeteers and Renaissance Faire singers. It’s got a definite Waiting for Guffman vibe of good old-fashioned Americana. The town folk definitely appear thrilled to have this opportunity thrust upon them.

Future episodes feature the citizens of Kingston, Rhode Island; Walla Walla, Washington; Athens, Ohio; San Marcos, Texas; Fairfield, Iowa; Hugo, Oklahoma and Mt. Airy, North Carolina. So it’s quite possible a long-lost cousin or long-distance booty caller might just pop up on your TV screen.

Singing the national anthem while unicycling through hoops of fire.

Showville
Premieres tonight on AMC
9:00/8:00 p.m. Central
www.amctv.com/shows/showville

Unconventional marriages have gotten out of control. Just as the wacky ultra-conservatives have predicted, the slippery slope is upon us.

First it was mixed races walking down the aisle.

Then came the gays. Skipping.

But now, we’ve catapulted right past their predictions of man marrying animal and welcomed the ultimate abomination into our great American culture.

Introducing your new Public Enemy Number One: the cookie chip.

This is what happens when one innocent cookie is corrupted by the highly persuasive snack chip community. It all started when one vulnerable sugar cookie made the conscious choice to go against nature and become a chip. Then he converted all his friends, Sea Salted Peanut Butter, Chocolate Chip and Cinnamon Sugar (though we fear she was headed for a life of prostitution or pole dancing with a name like that, so this is probably better).

Of course, there’s an evil corporation behind all this brainwashing. It’s the folks over at HannahMax Baking who’ve taken these poor confectionary souls and lured them to the dark side where seriously addictive, stupendously delicious, frighteningly crunchy snack creations live on the fringes of society.

The only way to rid the planet of these is to buy them all. So paint your big “God Hates Cookie Chips” signs, head to your computer and order away. Then, after the crates of sweet, crisp, buttery morsels of tastiness arrive, pull the shades, lock the doors and devour them until this is no trace whatsoever.

That hint of cocoa on your hushed request for forgiveness? That is all that will remain.

And we can finally get back to a normal world where chips are made of potatoes.

Cookie Chips
$23.96/4-bag package
www.crunchycookiechips.com

Cookie Chips are also available at Whole Foods, Tom Thumb, Piggly Wiggly, Fairway, Gelson’s, Safeway, Vons, Pavilions, Dominick’s and New York City’s iconic Zabars.

Even in death, few things on earth are gayer than Liberace.

Ghost hunters at Forest Lawn Memorial Park in the Hollywood Hills have consistently recorded otherworldly shouts of “Boo!”

With a lisp. Which is hard to accomplish.

So in anticipation of Behind the Candelabra, the HBO original movie on the performer’s life and relationship with another man premiering on May 26, we proudly present the official soundtrack.

Filled with original recordings of the legendary pianist’s music, as well as new versions of signature songs as sung by Liberace’s modern-day portrayer, Michael Douglas, it’s a delightfully over-the-top album. “The Liberace Boogie,” for one, is hard to get out of our heads and we’re sure the visual will be even more enduring.

But most of all, this record represents the musical accomplishments of one epically talented man who just happened to be adored by women all over the world.

Story of our lives. Wear one fur-lined sequined cape and suddenly you’re a chick magnet.

Behind the Candelabra – Music from the HBO Original Film
Available today
$9.99 on iTunes
$9.49 at amazon.com

We love curling up with our dogs, squeezing them tight, then throwing them in a suitcase for a long overseas vacation.

That’s because we’ve immortalized our beloved pets in pillow form and now we can take them anywhere. Or accessorize any piece of furniture around the house.

The process is simple. Email Brooklyn-based artist Ronda J. Smith. an existing photograph of your pooch, pussy, parrot, panda or piranha. Can’t decide which image will work best? Send her several pics and she’ll let you know which ones are best suited for pillowfication. You’ll then receive a mockup, and within five to 10 days she’ll have a completed fabric version of Princess Pauletta ready to ship.

After all, nothing’s cuter than a box full of puppies. Especially ones you don’t have to feed.

Custom Pet Pillows
$145
www.intheseam.com

Not to brag or anything, but we take a lot of great photos.

Problem is, most of them never get beyond the camera roll on our iPhone. And that has nothing to do with the fact that 80% of them are nude selfies shot in a bathroom mirror.

Well, now there’s a service that takes your Instagram pics and turns them into true works of art. Say hello to InstaThis.

Start by simply connecting via your Instagram account (or upload your own photos), then select your favorite images. Choose whether you want your printouts on wood or acrylic.

And voila!

Before you can photo bomb a couple’s honeymoon shot, you’ll have a real-life, tactile representation of your artistic prowess, not to mention your uncanny ability to capture images of every piece of food that’s ever been set before you.

Or take your Facebook profile pic, add a few snazzy filters and display your mug on the wall above your bed like they’re some sort of Warhol masterpieces.

Your fifteen minutes of fame just got a whole new medium.

From $35
www.InstaThis.com

Gay List Daily Deal:
Enter coupon code GAYLIST15 at checkout and receive $15 off your order.

Those lips. Those eyes. Those…pointy ears.

Something has clicked deep inside us, stirring emotions we didn’t know existed. Thanks to show-stopping performances and feats of nimble, athletic machismo by gay heartthrob Zachary Quinto (Spock) and straight-but-we-sure-wish-he-were-gay Chris Pine (Captain James T. Kirk), it’s time for us to come out of the closet.

We’re here. We’re queer. We’re Trekkies.

Wow. That’s a far more frightening confession than proclaiming our homosexuality, but it feels so right.

Yes, as the second installment of the revamped sci-fi franchise, Star Trek Into Darkness is a near-perfect action adventure spectacle made all the more spectacular in boundary-pushing 3D. After a string of poorly converted 3D movies, it seems that at least some in Hollywood are finally putting in the effort to make it a genuinely enjoyable, enhanced movie-watching experience.

From the eye-popping opening sequence to the die-hard fan-pleasing final scene, there’s plenty to love about this movie. Suspense. Danger. Sex. And Tribbles. It’s all there in larger-than-life cinematic glory.

Just waiting for each of you to boldly go. Perhaps twice. And at least once in IMAX.

Star Trek Into Darkness
Now playing in theaters galaxywide
www.startrekmovie.com

Ready to add award-winning designer to your résumé? It’s entirely possible. Besides, there’s plenty of room between Assistant Shamu Trainer at Sea World and Retirement Home Go-Go Boy.

Our good friends over at UncommonGoods are sponsoring another iPhone Case Design Challenge, which was a huge success last year. Think of it as portable art.

Portable art that could make you rich(ish).

Whether you’ve got an existing painting, sketch or computer doodle that’s been haunting your dreams because it’s so perfectly suited to be seen by millions, gripped lovingly in their hands and held up to their heads, or you want to start from scratch, this contest has big possibilities.

Of course, you don’t even have to be a trained artist or designer. UncommonGoods only requests that your designs tell a story, be intelligent and show your creative individuality. They’re also big fans of color and experimentation, so let your inner artist run wild.

The rewards? A $500 grand prize, but also 5% royalties on sales of your winning case. That could add up to a big pile of dough, which could provide the seed money to start your own iPhone case empire.

Or give you the freedom to scream, “This round’s on me!” at every bar all summer long.

iPhone Case Design Challenge
Deadline: May 31, 2013 at 11:59 p.m. ET
www.uncommongoods.com

Today, electronica makes a comeback.

The delightfully retro but unabashedly contemporary new album, Pale Green Ghosts, is one of those great records that feels immediately familiar. Like a long-lost love sticking his tongue in our ear.

It’s the second album for recording artist John Grant, but the first since the openly gay singer learned via text message that he was HIV positive. Filled with deep, dark tracks peppered with upbeat riffs of rhythmic sensation, Pale Green Ghosts is hauntingly beautiful and loaded with subtext.

Recorded in Iceland, which we’re sure only adds to the layers of moodiness, the tracks featuring Sinead O’Connor on guest vocals provide star-powered nuance and extra depth.

The album represents Grant’s current journey of strength and survival, and we think it will resonate with anyone in the LGBT community who’s ever struggled with depression or shocking revelations. And if you also happen to love ‘80s music, all the better. This is a flashback without any side effects.

Except maybe a longing to wear long black clothes and dark eyeliner. Or listen to the tracks on a cassette Walkman.

Pale Green Ghosts, John Grant
$9.99 on iTunes
$12.28 on Amazon
www.johngrantmusic.com

Imagine a place where the turquoise sea splashes up against white sand beaches while a steel drum band plays “Limbo Rock” as you make love to a hot, eye-patched, peg-legged pirate and an islander braids your hair while feeding bananas to the toucan perched on your shoulder, dancing lightly to the sounds of children blowing into conch shells under a nearby palapa as dolphins play in the distance.

That’s pretty much what Blue Chair Bay rum tastes like. Only more tropical.

It’s always fun to discover a new spirit, but rarely have we had the opportunity to try one so very new. On the market just a couple weeks, the line of three rums from country crooner Kenny Chesney debuts just in time for summer umbrella-drink season.

Available in white, coconut and spiced coconut varieties, each premium rum is perfectly sippable on its own, or ideal in an island-worthy cocktail. The recipe options are practically limitless.

We particularly enjoy the Blue Chair Bay Coconut Spiced served on the rocks with a splash of soda to cut the sweetness. No crazy ingredients necessary.

Better still, the two flavored rums have a mere 26.5% alcohol by volume.

Or about 26.5% less than our own bodies.

Blue Chair Bay Rums
From $18.99, 750ml
www.bluechairbayrum.com 

Welcome to a brave new world where literary classics become blockbuster 3D movies.

The dust jumps off the screen next summer in Quentin Tarrantino’s epic 3D road trip adventure, The Grapes of Wrath: Djoad Family Unchained.

Martin Scorsese returns to motion-capture animation to bring The Collected Poems of Emily Dickinson to IMAX 3D theaters in a Fantasia-style collage of trippy vignettes. “Because I Could Not Stop For Death” is slated to be the film’s horrific 36-minute opening sequence.

And Harper Lee’s beloved To Kill A Mockingbird comes alive in a whole new way in the talented hands of Chicago director Rob Marhsall. Hey, Boo! is a Neil Patrick Harris-starring musical focusing on the events of the novel from Mr. Radley’s perspective.

But for now, we’ve got Baz Luhrmann’s The Great Gatsby to more than satisfy our lust for three-dimensional literature. Set in a lush, surreal New York City circa 1922, the F. Scott Fitzgerald tome unfolds like a carnival viewed through a kaleidoscope. Filled with wonderful, eye-popping visuals and lavish set pieces, it’s everything you’d expect the director of Moulin Rouge! to do with, well, just about anything.

It’s Leonardo DiCaprio, however, who steals the show with a more commanding on-screen presence as the titular Gatsby than we’ve seen from the actor in a while. Utterly charming, spell-bindingly handsome and the perfect embodiment of debonair, DiCaprio’s casting is superb.

Of course, the wild party scenes provide the biggest wow factors, whimsically portraying the era of jazz-fueled romps made more exciting thanks to ever-loosening morals and bootleg liquor. It’s no wonder narrator Nick Carraway (Tobey Maguire) resides in a sanitarium with a diagnosis of “Morbidly Alcoholic.”

Totally relatable.

The Great Gatsby
Opens today in theaters everywhere
www.thegreatgatsbymovie.com