Pam Ann speaks the truth. That’s because she’s the crankiest flight attendant ever, including the ones we’ve bitch-slapped at 30,000 feet for throwing ‘tude our way. We caught up with Caroline Reid’s hilarious, irreverent, completely inappropriate alter ego between peanut service and the in-flight movie to chat about the current state of the travel industry. And a little about her upcoming NYC show.

Are you a fan of the new full-body scanning equipment or do you prefer the more personal pat-down?
I love the thought of someone looking at me naked through the full-body scanning equipment. That turns me on, but personally I love a good old-fashioned inappropriate TSA pat-down and finger through JFK!

Now that Osama’s been killed, has some of the excitement been taken out of your job?
Oh, trust me, there’s always someone younger and hungrier coming out of a compound in Afghanistan. The thrill is who is the next Osama? [laughs] They should have Al-Qaeda IDOL! Find the new OSAMA!

What do you think of the new convertible aircraft like Southwest’s ceiling that tore open mid-flight?
They are great for Southwest because you don’t want to have to listen to those whining passengers. It just gets a bit too noisy at 37,000 feet. I can’t hear myself think. It’s tricky serving coffee and tea! So I won’t be placing any orders [for one] soon.

We saw your post on Facebook of the new volcanic ash cloud. Pretty impressive. Are the passengers easier to deal with when they’re frightened?
Of course, a fearful passenger is the most fun to play with. We play all sorts of games with them. One of my favorites is to look like we are scared in the jump seat as we take off, then scream really loudly as we get into the air. Always works. Another is to look at another crew member on board and discuss a note you pretended to find in the restroom reading ‘There is a BOMB on board.’ Another – and my all time favorite – is to get your most Arabic looking passenger, put a scarf on their head and tell them to run down the aisle with a Mosque clock in hand counting down 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, then scream ‘kidding!’ Scares the fark out of everyone.

What airlines are pissing you off the most these days? Feel free to name names.
Any low cost carrier, particularly Ryan Air in the UK. They don’t even have wheels or wings. They are now chucking their planes like javelins to save money on fuel. I even think the cabin crew is starting to pilot the aircrafts, as well, to save money.

We got a lot of hate mail for a story we wrote on old, cranky flight attendants. How do you cope with negativity?
Seriously, United Airlines cabin crew are so old they are ghosts. And as for ‘Valerie’ from American Airlines, she is 105 and still flying today. AA is still evacuating the AA plane that skidded off the runway in Kingston, Jamaica two years ago. The Jamaicans are getting so frustrated as they want to use the plane to make steel drums!

Everyone has an opinion and you are always going to offend someone. If you don’t then you aren’t doing a good job. I quite like winding people up for a laugh. People can take things so seriously. YAWN!

If Richard Branson offered you a position on his first Virgin Galactic passenger flight, would you accept?
FARK yea! I actually wrote to Virgin Galactic to book a seat. They already have 400 people booked all paying $20,000 deposit, the ticket to space costs $200,000. It will take them at least five years to get all those people up, so it may be years before people go. Richard Branson is so smart; he is earning interest on all those deposits. Pan Am sold tickets to the moon in the ‘60s and they never went! If Richard offered me a seat, I am there with my space suit on.

So, an iPhone App? We’re pretty impressed. Any other Pam Ann merchandise we can look out for?
I am so excited about the i-APP, we are currently working on doing more destinations, available soon on iTunes. I am working on producing Pam Ann Airline bags, T-shirts, Lily Glasses and lots more. I will have a Pam Ann Merch online shop soon.

Are you sad that Oprah has quit her daytime talk show?
Thank god she has gone (for a minute anyway). I was sick of all the goodbye shows, and why was Katie Holmes there? WHY! Oprah isn’t going anywhere, she just wanted to get the fark out of that contract and start her own show up on her OWN network! [laughs] I would love to see Oprah shitfaced and doing a line! [laughs harder]

Finally, what can people expect from your show at Joe’s Pub next week?
To be honest, I have no idea. All I know so far is that I am super excited about Dondre, my Puerto Rican rapper bf who is opening my show with a Pam Ann rap, ‘Getem bitch.’

Will there be gays in the audience?
The gays created Pam Ann so me thinks it will be full of gays. I think the gays buy tickets to my shows because they know how many hot gays will be in the audience. I am like the human Grindr.

PAM ANN – ‘Air Scare’
Tickets, $30
June 2, 3, 4, 8, 9, 2011
Joe’s Pub
425 Lafayette Street, New York
Tickets & info at www.joespub.com

www.pamann.com

From large to small scale furniture to lighting, artwork, and accessories, you will surely find something to suit your suite.

Pieces are up for grabs like a custom magenta automobile lacquered coffee table for $1,500 (regularly $4,000) or stackable primary colored cubes – 4 for $900 (regularly $1,800). Our favorite has to be the custom ebonized finish chair – super chic and priced at $1,500 (regularly $3,000).

So pack your passports and head out to Dumbo!

Sale starts today
Friday & Saturday, Feb 25-26, 10:00 a.m. – 7:00 p.m.
Sunday, Feb 27, 10:00 a.m. – 6:00 p.m.
Cash or check only

77 Front Street at Washington Street
Dumbo, Brooklyn
www.ccinteriordesign.com

Subway instructions:
F train to York Street Station
Sale is 3 blocks from the subway.

If you’re on a budget, but want your sweets to stay warm even when you’re not around, wrap them up in Brooker Hollow’s knit and crochet fingerless gloves ($15-$20), scarves ($40-$50), and afghan throws ($200). The colors and patterns are modern and stylish, and they’re handmade by a wonderfully crafty Brooklyn gal. We’ve been sporting a Brooker Hollow scarf lately, and everywhere we go someone says they love and need it! Obviously.

Available at www.etsy.com/shop/brookerhollow

If you’re anything like us, you’ve tried capturing lovely moments with your partner over candle-lit dinners, evening strolls through your neighborhood or dancing the night away in a dimly lit club. But up until recently, every time we used our digital camera in low light (with or without the flash), everyone comes out looking freakish. Sony has put a stop to that with the CyberShot W370. With features like low-light photo quality capabilities, a panorama option, HD video and a long lens (you know we like ‘em long), all for $169, it looks like technology has finally caught up with our camera wants versus budget.

Available at electronics stores across NYC

But, if this is the year you’re looking to make a big impression, we recommend the gorgeous Rony Tennenbaum LVOE diamond ring collection (pictured above). Because love is love, no matter how you spell it, the LVOE collection is meant to signify that your love is yours, and you define it, and live it the way you want to. LVOE signature rings are $1500, and the diamond eternity rings start at $2000. You won’t have to doubt that these will be well received. In fact, don’t even ask for a gift receipt; this is a for sure Valentine’s Day gift win!

Visit Rony’s Soho store at 252 Mott Street (between Houston and Prince) or call him directly at (917) 575-9566.
www.ronytennenbaum.com

THE DEAL: Get $50 worth of flowers for just $30 from PC Floral Designs.

That's 100% of the pleasure of pleasing us at just 60% of the cost!

You can use it for Valentine's Day or just surprise us on any given Wednesday. This offer is available only through the end of the week, but you can use it for up to a year.

Sure, you could send flowers to your real boyfriend instead if you like, but the point of that is completely lost on us.

PC Floral Designs
41-03 31 Avenue
Astoria, NY 11103
(718) 274-7673

Full Retail Value: $50
THE GAY LIST DEAL: $30
40% Discount

This offer exclusively available at www.GayListDeals.com

We checked out Industry Bar last week, the newest arrival to gay nightlife hot-hood, Manhattan’s Hell’s Kitchen founded by nightlife vets Bob Pontarelli and Stephen Heighton, the duo behind Crowbar, Barracuda, Leshko's Restaurant and Elmo Restaurant. When we arrived, friends in tow, we were immediately taken aback at how popular this bar already seems to be, considering how many boys were mingling, drinking and boogying.

The set up is cute, if not a little kitschy, and when populated by a crowd it feels comfortable and cozy. Industry is a large space, though it seems smaller and more intimate given the several living room silhouettes, bar and cocktail area.

Make sure to check out the separate dance room with an impressive fire effect window that provides a successful and modern focal point to the room, not to mention casts a romantic glow onto your suitors. Mood lighting, anyone?

The bartenders weren’t the most welcoming men in the room; in fact they were a little too cool for school and seemed bored. But who really goes out looking for the help? The men we met on our side of the bar were professional, attractive and everyone seemed to be in good spirits. And if you’re looking to spot a familiar face from TV, we spotted “Gay-lebrity” and Logo’s “A-List” castmember Reichen Lehmkuhl playing pool.

Industry boasts impressive Thursday evenings with great music, drag-goddess Shequida’s always impressive performances and a late night selection of men for the grabbing, dancing, or otherwise!

Industry Bar
355 West 52nd Street, Hell’s Kitchen
4:00 p.m. – 4:00 a.m.
(646) 476-2747
www.Industry-Bar.com

We “propose” that we do it like we’ve done it for years – our way! As the marketplace for gay and lesbian weddings widens, and becomes more encompassing, consumers should know that there are options; designers and companies that take a “for us, by us” approach.

Enter Rony Tennenbaum, an Israeli native (yes, boys he served in the military) and New York City resident for more than 25 years now, who is revolutionizing the bridal industry. Rony has been in jewelry all of his adult life, and has taken his expertise and passion for the industry to a whole new level with Rony Tennenbaum Designs, a line of engagement, wedding and bridal jewelry for the LGBTQ community.

From his extra brilliant white and black diamonds to his matte setting finishes, and with a range of masculine to feminine ring silhouettes, we love that Rony’s designs will make even the pickiest gay on your holiday gift list beam with excitement. After all, who doesn’t love them some bling?

To see Rony’s complete diamond collection, stop in his Nolilta shop, and start dripping those fingers in frosting. No more Breakfast at Tiffany’s for us, I think we’d rather have Brunch at Rony’s.

Rony Tennenbaum Designs
252 Mott Street, Nolita
(917) 575-9566
www.RonyTennenbaum.com

Wilhelmina Models is conducting their second annual Hot Body Model Search this Saturday, October 16, 2010, at the company’s headquarters in NYC and they’re looking for you to bring your sexy carcass to the table. (Notice we didn’t say casting couch.)

Ten finalists will be chosen in early 2011 and then two winners will be awarded the Grand Prize: a 5-year modeling contract with Wilhelmina Models, an editorial feature in Shape or Men’s Fitness, a $500 gift card to The Vitamin Shoppe, a one-year supply of Trimwater and a four-night stay at Playa Grande Resort for two people. Wow, we feel like Heidi Klum listing the prizes at the beginning of Project Runway. Now off to Mood Fabrics, everyone! (Well, only if you plan to make your own clothes.)

The entry fee is only $20 and you can apply online if you’re not in New York or one of the other casting call cities. The online search ends November 17, so get your headshots and resumes updated. A panel of judges will review all entries and call back the ten finalists to New York.

Men and women 18 and over are eligible and in one of the only job interviews that can get away with it, looks will count more than anything. But personality goes a long way, too. No matter how hot you are, nobody wants to work with a jerk.

Good luck, and if you win, remember your dear friends at Gay List Daily for opening the door to your future. And unlike the professionals at Wilhelmina, we will take sex as a thank-you gift. Or half your Vitamin Shoppe gift card. We’re out of Horny Goat Weed.

www.WilhelminaModelSearch.com

Many of the children live below the poverty level, according to O’Donnell, so this is a great way for them to break out of their shells and discover talents they may not have otherwise known they had.

This week, the kids are performing an original musical about a single day in high school, called My Life: Today. It’s about the students, written by the students and performed by the students.

The show is heartwarming and exhilarating, plus unlike other Broadways shows, buying tickets to this one helps out a really great cause. Not that funding Patti LuPone’s fabulous lifestyle isn’t worthwhile. It’s just tickets to this really help out someone in need. That’s why we’ll always love us some Rosie O’Donnell.

My Life: Today
Tickets: $20
Opens tomorrow night, October 5 at 8:00 p.m.
The Duke Theatre
229 West 42nd Street, 2nd Floor (between 7th & 8th Avenues)
www.nymf.org

It turns out the LGBT community gets several kinds of cancer much more often than those straight people do. We’re not sure why – but now at least somebody is doing something about it.

The American Cancer Society is holding its first-ever fundraising event, called Relay For Life, specifically to fight cancer in the LGBT community this Saturday in Manhattan.

Relay for Life is an all-day ‘festival of the spirit’ made up of community teams, where people come together to pay tribute to those we have lost to cancer, and to celebrate those who have survived, while raising money for cancer education, research and services.

The event theme for this extra-special LGBT Relay for Life is “Red Carpet Relay” and participants are encouraged to come in movie or television-themed outfits. (We call “Wizard of Oz!”)

Throughout the day, there will be music, entertainment, celebrity appearances and fundraising activities. Entertainers lined up so far include Broadway star Marty Thomas (Xanadu, Wicked), award-winning NYC DJs Steven Paul and Brenda Black, Australian Weimar Cabaret singer Kim Smith, #1 Billboard dance recording artist Jason Walker, and many more.

Near the end of the day, there will be a moving luminaria ceremony to honor and remember those who have passed from cancer.

Come out Saturday to help stop the spread of the c-word. (Still not talking about lady parts, but if we can stop that too, all the better.)

LGBT Relay for Life
Saturday, September 25
10:00 a.m. – 7:00 p.m.
World Financial Center Atrium
220 Vesey Street, Manhattan

To register or join a team, to make a donation or for more information on the LGBT Relay For Life event, visit www.relayforlife.org/lgbt.

Every Monday at 10:30 p.m., we can wash those Monday blues away with plenty of infused vodka at Vauxhall at Vlada Lounge. (And for a little cultural education, Vlada's named after the gay section of London, and it also means “train station” in Russian. Are all train stations in Russia like this new gay hotspot?)

They popped our Vauxhall cherries earlier this week with special guests Raven-O and Sherry Vine, who return again Monday to give us a double-dose.

And for the show queens and attention-starved thespians among us, Vauxhall was developed with the theater community in mind. Anyone can submit a 1920's-themed cabaret act as a YouTube link on Vlada's Facebook page, where they're voted on using the site's “Like” button. You may even be contacted to perform for future Vauxhall evenings.

Come to think of it, isn't that how Liza got her start?

Vauxhall at Vlada Lounge
Mondays, 10:30 p.m.
331 W. 51st Street (between 8th & 9th)
Hell's Kitchen
(212) 984-8030
www.vladabar.com

Don't forget to submit your performance via www.facebook.com/vladabar