Los Angeles 06.18.2009

Serving The Queen(s)

A cause worth enlisting for

Canada’s appeal continues to shine thanks to full marriage equality, but we’d seriously consider relocating to the Maple Leaf if a draft were to take place stateside.

No, not the kind of draft that is cured by closing the door – the kind of draft that, unless Obama fulfills his campaign promises, only the opening of the closet door might thwart.

Our faith in the current administration as well as in LGBT soldiers remains strong, but when it comes to us, the only things about joining the army that we can deal with are the sexy uniforms, the strict dominant/obedient relationships, the hordes of fit men oceans away from their wives or girlfriends…. OK, OK – there are plenty of reasons we’d enjoy enlisting.

For now, however, the only military we’re joining is the Hugs and Kisses Army.

Yeah, it sounds like a Care Bears episode or a cutesy club our tween niece dreamed up, but the Hugs and Kisses Army is serious about its mission.

Recently launched in honor of the now-official LGBT pride month, the H&K Army is our kind of force. Setting aside competition for collaboration, H&K is made up of L.A.’s hautest gay club promoters, strategically aligned to fight for the L.A. Gay and Lesbian Center.

The battle between the LAGLC and the sour economy has created countless local victims, but a booty-perking 100% of the army’s proceeds will go towards winning the mêlée.

Joining the army is as simple as attending one of the participating clubs on a specific night, and doing what is normally done – enjoying several cocktails. Sure, we might throw in a few push-ups just to increase the possibilities of hooking up with fellow recruits, but the only sweat this army requires is that which is made on the dance floor.

If heading to the gay battlegrounds isn’t a possibility, however, one can also earn rank by participating in H&K Army’s eBay charity auction.

Who knows? Maybe at the next event a fellow soldier will help us learn the true meaning of “honorable discharge”…

Hugs and Kisses Army Events
Sunday, June 20: Redlight
Thursday, June 25: Big Fat Dick
Tuesday, July 7: Wildness
Saturday, July 25: Society
Entrance fees vary

Online auction can be found on eBay at Hugsandkissesarmy2009
www.hugsandkissesarmy.com

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