National 05.04.2009

Christian Nation

The Andrew Christian Tour brings gay retail to life

Our parents like to remind us – often in front of extended family – that they knew we swished for the gays the moment we begged our brothers and sisters to reenact scenes from the 80’s film Mannequin. “And they would insist that they got to play Kim Catrall’s character,” our folks often add, their intonation following the roll of their eyes.

More decades have passed since our reenactments than we’d like to admit, but our imaginations still run wild with fantasies of mannequins coming to life – only now it’s the ripped Adonises that stand listlessly in the window displays of gay retail shops.

Lately, these impossibly chiseled mannequins have donned Andrew Christian’s name. The hot (in all senses of the adjective) designer’s line of underwear have made him a star in menswear, and now he’s bringing gay venues across the country to life with living, godlike models on a meet and greet tour.

Aside from seeing models donning Christian’s designs in a fashion show, the designer himself will be on hand to meet fans.

Like a heartfelt episode of Oprah, the moment we finally get to meet Christian will inspire the gay tears to run down onlooker’s freshly Botoxed faces. After all, his hi-tech underwear has kicked our love-life into high gear.

We’ll personally thank him for his anti-muffin top elastic waistband technology; we’ll cry on his shoulder as we explain how our self-confidence has inflated because of his “bubble butt” lifting and support designs. These creations are the technologies that really change the world – or at least change our view of the world, as we spend more time on our backs because of them.

Hot models, hi-tech underwear and a gorgeous, successful designer? This is one tour we’re OK with seeing less (clothing on the models that is) for our money.

May 8 – New Orleans (Bourbon Pub)
May 9 – Atlanta (Boy Next Door)
May 15 – Seattle (UnderU4Men)
May 16 – Portland (UnderU4Men)
May 22 – Houston (MaleUWear)
May 23 – Dallas (Union Jack)
For more info and dates (San Fran, LA, Chicago, NYC), visit www.andrewchristian.com/events.htm

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